I Can See The Future

The deepest secrets of the Eye and its beholder

Sadism: The driving force of life

Sadism was coined by Marquis de Sade a 18th century French writer. Traditionally it is “the pleasure extracted out of inflicting pain and humiliation on another person”. It used to represent pleasure extracted out of certain sexual activities.  But nowadays it has transcended these words. It has expanded its branches to each and every aspect of human social  life. For some it is a way of the life, as they pounce on every opportunity and extract sadistic pleasure out of it.  Some people take it as humorous entity and experiment it on some hapless but deserving creatures. Then there are people like me who are made to embrace it. This compulsion is put on people like me when they leave home to study or work in a different city. The new setting imposes a new rulebook of life upon us. The rulebook has only one Dog’s rule in it: Be the prop of a Comedian or be the Comedian himself.  I chose the latter option or rather I sanitized my personality to become one. Then on life was good, making fun of other people became a part of everyday routine. Although I was at the receiving sometimes but I found a solution to that problem too. I started making fun of myself and ganged up with friends to make fun of others. The idea behind that was not to get singled out. Gradually it became a habit and I started poking fun at everybody involved in my life, which constituted: my mum, any relatives, any girls who were my friends or for that sake any random person I met.My Father was never a part of it, I never irritated him because he would have stopped giving pocket money to me.  So, this holy force is now driving my life. In my quest to attain divinity by this force, I experienced its many forms. Some of which I am going to illustrate.

  • The first form is when you do it on the face. Meaning you have the power to put the other person into misery and he can’t retort back. I was on the receiving end of such a force. It was during my train journey from Bombay to Jaipur. I woke up at 5 a.m in the morning to take leak. After relieving my self, I found me appreciating the Weather. Little droplets of rain were coming down steadily, Sun was about to rise so the sky had a tinge of Orange. I had an impulse to smoke. First let me clarify you that I am not a regular smoker, but the day before for some reason I had bought a Cigarette. I sat on the seat for T.T.E  near the door, it is a provision in very few sleeper compartment and I was lucky that I had a reservation in one of them. I was absorbing the the beauty of nature with each drag, then in the middle of my second drag I was tapped on the shoulder. I turned around to see the towering figure of a T.T.E, he took the Cigarette from my stunned figure and pointed to a sign. The words on that sign were immediately tattooed on my forehead, Rs.100 fine for smoking. I had to cough up 50 rupees for the T.T.E. Deprived of the Cigarette I stared at the now, Melancholic sites. Suddenly I saw smoke drifting by my window, vengeance flared up inside me. If I can’t smoke I won’t let others smoke too, I thought as I covered the distance in four strides. I was petrified by what I saw there, the T.T.E was leaning casually on the door and smoking my Cigarette. He turned around in an offhand manner and stared at me like a King who has spotted an oddity in his chamber.
  • The second form is when a person is not an accomplice in the act , but he is the only one who knows about its consequences and enjoys them. I along with few friends was on the receiving end of such a sting. We went to dine in a Restaurant,  which was relatively unknown to us. A friend had recommended it, so we went there and ordered two Chicken dishes. The waiter took the order gleefully and brought it in 15 mins. The food didn’t look great, but hunger got the better of us and we  started wolfing it down. After eating one Chapati, the hunger subsided a bit and we came to realize the fact that both the gravys  were the same and tasted awful. One more chapati and we got up cursing the food and  the blasphemous hotel owner.  We paid the bill and were leaving the place when out of the corner of my eye I saw the Waiter who was cleaning our table, smile. I immediately turned around and addressed his departing back, “Oi, what is so amusing that you are smiling.” ” No, sir I am not.” He replied.” Then turn around and face us.” I bellowed. Slowly, he wheeled around to reveal a  weird smile on his face that said,” I am sorry” as well as “HOW ABOUT THAT .”
  • The third form is bit complicated. In it the person on the receiving end thinks the other is extracting sadistic pleasure out of him, but the other person doesn’t have that intention. I will explain it Metaphorically. I have a friend who is an evil powerful man, say like Ra’s aL ghul from Batman. He has an ultimate power called ‘Chadar’ which according to legend can destroy any living creature. He has a rival, who doesn’t know about the rivalry. Now, during our office days, my friend decided to seal the fate of his rival, with the use of ‘Chadar’. We feared that the demise of the rival was near. But the next day every thing changed and my friend had acute Diarrhea. We came to know that his rival was alright. Cursing his fate my friend was popping pill after pill. Then his phone rang, it was the rival who in a concerned voice asked about his well being. But for some weird reason, we had a picture of his with an evil smile imprinted in our mind.
  • The fourth type is when a person pleasures himself on the pains of others, while suffering himself too.  One of my friends is an apt example of it. He is a person who was the most irregular in attending College.  We used to call him ‘The Man’.Many motivational talks on regularity were conducted by College, a ’tile experiment’ was a part of it. Many people became emotional, decided to mend their ways. Although, the emotions lasted for a few days only but some where in their conscience they had guilt. This did not have an effect on any of us friends specially on ‘The Man’. He was always unperturbed by authority. He used to  play games on his handset while in an addressal. He was fined several times for absenteeism. Every time he paid the fine he used to say,”Bhai ab to regular rehna hi padega, its high time now. Ab kal se to hum pukka college aayenge.” But , next day his absence used to greet us. Recently the authority decided to put a leash on us ‘Vagabonds,’ by imposing heavy fines on absentees. It straightened me and my friends out. But ‘The Man’ remained impervious to it all. Furious management called an addressal. ‘The Man’ had some signs of anxiety on his face as we entered the hall. But, as soon as the authority figure entered, the anxiety vanished to be replaced by a smile on his face and glint in the eye.
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July 29, 2010 Posted by | Opinion, Random Thoughts | 6 Comments

Golden Corridors and Stone Walls

Strike’em hard they are coming at you,
they have glinting blows to get them through.

What makes you think they are treacherous fools,
don’t they know I’m the king of this zoo.

I’ve been through there present and your past,
they’ll make you flee and you’ll be an outcast.

My fleets are strong, they’ll them see through,
but when I’m done with them,I’ll deal with you.

Traveler shook his head, vanished from the sight,
soon the hands with drinks were engulfed by night.

Fed on vermin banished from the sight,
the dark night made him remember the light.

Strike’em hard they are coming at you,
they have glinting blows to get them through.

He scratched the walls as echoes hit his head,
moonlight struck him sharp on the stone bed.

June 28, 2008 Posted by | Random Thoughts | 2 Comments

The Silent Observer

Blood being spilled for apiece of land,
destroying their paradise with their own hand.
Looking at each other with utmost hate,
not thinking about actions that are destroying their fate.
Sowing guns as the seeds,
reaping bombs from Saffron fields.
Sitting in midst of this war,
trapped like a fly in a jar.
When people ask me what am I doing,
I say I am silently observing.

Provoked on name of religion,
loosing the power to reason.
Opening their arms to hail the red dawn,
in th e process ignoring the bloody Sun.
The roads being bombed by the tanks,
innocent people dying on the flank.
Breaking into his own home to do the theft,
now chaos is all but left.
Doing nothing to manage the situation,
I am just silently observing the poisonous potion.

Death coming from all the directions,
their country being cut into sections.
Hooded beasts ruling their land,
saying they are doing it for them.
Slip of character due to oil,
sowing seeds on other man’s soil
Making their life hell,
ghost is creating riots from its shell.
What am I doing for my kin,
I am silently observing flask of all the man’s sin.

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April 1, 2007 Posted by | Random Thoughts | 1 Comment

An Unfathomable Question

What is life? To me life has always been a wild goose. I have been chasing it since my childhood but still haven’t found a trace of it. It has always been a thing lying on the horizon, the more I chase it the more distant it appears. But in my quest to find or a more apt word should be to discover life , I have been to many places. Though in reality there are not many places I have been , but is the physical form only way to travel, can’t you travel through your mind. I have traveled through my mind, I have been to the weirdest of places I have been to the lush green prairies, to the deepest of oceans, to the darkest of dungeons, to the tallest of mountains. Everywhere I saw a different form of life in practice. But none I saw satisfied me. I saw life in forms of Ants who work tirelessly in summer to store food for winter but again collect food in winters, I saw life in form of birds who fly away from scarecrow not because they fear it but because its a game which amuses them,thus giving up their food for the sake of amusement, I saw life in form of beggars who go here and there and beg just to get one time’s meal but instead of eating they waste their earning to loose their senses. I saw life in the form of dogs who lick their master’s feet only to get a bone thrown for their food but instead of eating it they store it in a pit, I saw life in the form of a female snake who with all her love gives birth to many children but eat them when she’s hungry, then I saw life in form of an ordinary human being doing all the hard work for a piece of paper known as money which he will discard after some time like he discarded old copper coins. So the question that still stands like an unconquerable state is “What is life?” Food, amusement, greatness, happiness, children,work, money or ……………………………………………………………………

Nothing

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April 1, 2007 Posted by | Random Thoughts | 2 Comments

Property Of Chameleon

Let me begin with an incident of my life. It was the day when my grandfather’s younger brother died, he had some property but had no heir. So while his wife and other ladies were lamenting on his death, the question among all his relatives was to whom the torch of fire will be handed over in order to cremate his body meaning who will be the heir to his property. That was the day when I saw greed in the most expressionless eyes. All the myths and respects broke like a mirror which presented everyone as an Angel. That day I saw the hunger of a materialistic thing in most ancient of eyes. I understood the true nature of The Man. We are no different from a Chameleon who changes its color to save
his skin,in my view we the so called greatest creation God are worse than the stinking Reptile who changes color to save its own skin.

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A Man can change color for the slightest of his gains.We call the gain ours. We call everything ours land,power, food, gain, loss, joy,sorrow. But nothing is ours even our body belongs to the Earth from which it was generated and where it will ultimately disintegrate. We laugh for something which is not ours, we cry for something which is not ours,we fight over something which is not ours, we die for something which is not ours. So what is ours, what is our purpose of coming to this mortal world? The answer is our thoughts. Our thoughts never die,even when our bones will be decomposed by a small microorganism, even when the car we drive will become an ancient artifact. Our thoughts never die they live on, that is what in religions is known as Spirit. We live on through our thoughts. We can change the whole perspective of this mortal world, given we convey our thoughts to others.

March 21, 2007 Posted by | Random Thoughts | Leave a comment

My Boat And The Whirlpool

As darkness creeps in,
I feel a tinge in my heart,
every dream I had is dissolving in the dark.
I am riding a boat which is sinking very fast,
I am blind and I am chasing a wild goose ,
As my boat heads towards Whirlpool.whirlpool.JPG

Many invisible hands are pulling me in a death pool,
darkness is taking control over my soul,
I cry in the vast ocean of darkness,
but there is no light to help me here,
I feel another surge towards death pool,
As my boat towards Whirlpool.

The ocean is toying with my boat,
the sky is laughing on me,
I am trying to defy all odds,
but every coming tide hits reality on my face.
The grim reaper smells its prey and gives fire more fuel,
As my boat head towards Whirlpool.

March 20, 2007 Posted by | Random Thoughts | 1 Comment